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<title>Mental Discharge II: The Sequel</title>
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<description>The latest discharge in a nifty RSS gift pack.</description>
<lastBuildDate>Sun, 18 Nov 2007 22:03:29 GMT</lastBuildDate>
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<item>
<title>Ten Things &quot;Geek&quot; Clients Need to Fucking Learn</title>
<link>http://www.mentaldischarge.com/1204</link>
<pubDate>Fri, 31 Aug 2007 00:27:32 GMT</pubDate>
<description>You're lucky to have me as your IT guy. So, in fairness and as a sign of respect, here are ten things you should know about our business relationship and the services I offer.</description>
<author>Marcus Caughcus</author>
<category>Technology</category>
</item>
<item>
<title>Just Give Me the God Damn Beep Already!</title>
<link>http://www.mentaldischarge.com/1203</link>
<pubDate>Thu, 02 Aug 2007 06:32:06 GMT</pubDate>
<description>Why do I need a full one minute instructional guide on how to speak into a phone after the greeting but before the beep?</description>
<author>Steven Cleamer</author>
<category>Technology</category>
</item>
<item>
<title>Not Tonight, Honey. I'm Playing World of Warcraft.</title>
<link>http://www.mentaldischarge.com/1202</link>
<pubDate>Tue, 31 Jul 2007 19:18:09 GMT</pubDate>
<description>Maybe if you were as specfuckingtacular to hang out with as you think, your significant other wouldn't prefer virtual company in an online world.</description>
<author>Michael Kaughginu</author>
<category>Sex</category>
</item>
<item>
<title>Consumer Alert: I'm a Douchebag Who Hired 1-800-GOT-JUNK</title>
<link>http://www.mentaldischarge.com/1201</link>
<pubDate>Wed, 18 Jul 2007 18:05:39 GMT</pubDate>
<description>Need it hauled away? Want it done slowly and expensively? Then you need to hire The World's Most Expensive Junk Removing Whiners.</description>
<author>Steven Cleamer</author>
<category>Humanity</category>
</item>
<item>
<title>Is Your Mr. Poopy Happy Today?</title>
<link>http://www.mentaldischarge.com/1100</link>
<pubDate>Fri, 08 Jun 2007 02:08:44 GMT</pubDate>
<description>No matter where you go, he'll be right behind you. Through all the trials and tribulations, he'll always have your back. When you're down in the dumps, he'll be there.</description>
<author>Marcus Caughcus</author>
<category>Humanity</category>
</item>
<item>
<title>Why am I Getting Fucked by my Consumer Electronics Store?</title>
<link>http://www.mentaldischarge.com/1495</link>
<pubDate>Thu, 03 May 2007 02:59:07 GMT</pubDate>
<description>Whether I need DVDs or a home theater system to enjoy midget on goat action, my consumer electronics store always manages to fuck me six ways from Sunday.</description>
<author>Steven Cleamer</author>
<category>Technology</category>
</item>
<item>
<title>15 Assholes That'll Deny Us Flying Cars</title>
<link>http://www.mentaldischarge.com/1009</link>
<pubDate>Thu, 03 May 2007 00:12:28 GMT</pubDate>
<description>Many believed the early 21st century as a time where flying cars would be common. Unfortunately, the cars of tomorrow will only fly in the clouds of our dreams.</description>
<author>Steven Cleamer</author>
<category>Route66</category>
</item>
<item>
<title>Drive-By Road Rage Signs</title>
<link>http://www.mentaldischarge.com/1042</link>
<pubDate>Wed, 11 May 2005 23:00:00 GMT</pubDate>
<description>Flash a sign appropriate to the occasion to a neighboring driver to let them know that their traffic infraction is not only a disrespect to you, but other drivers among you.</description>
<author>Steven Cleamer</author>
<category>Route66</category>
</item>
<item>
<title>Bill O'Reilly on Sex Harassment Claim: &quot;I'm a 'tits' man.&quot;</title>
<link>http://www.mentaldischarge.com/1016</link>
<pubDate>Fri, 15 Oct 2004 00:00:00 GMT</pubDate>
<description>Fox News's Bill O'Reilly fires back at sexual harassment allegations at a press conference, claiming his former producer's allegations are not fair and balanced.</description>
<author>Biff Yeager</author>
<category>News</category>
</item>
<item>
<title>Getting Respect by Toothbrushing the Toilet Bowl</title>
<link>http://www.mentaldischarge.com/1032</link>
<pubDate>Thu, 19 Aug 2004 00:00:00 GMT</pubDate>
<description>The sanctity you once cherished living with mom is over and you'll be forced to live with a cretin who abuses your groceries, dishes, and hygiene products.</description>
<author>Steven Cleamer</author>
<category>Humanity</category>
</item>
<item>
<title>MPAA Issues Licenses to Kill</title>
<link>http://www.mentaldischarge.com/1015</link>
<pubDate>Sat, 19 Jun 2004 23:00:00 GMT</pubDate>
<description>Film pirates must already ask themselves if illegally taping a movie is worth the court fines. Soon, sneaky cinema-goers have to ask themselves a new question: Do they feel lucky?</description>
<author>Biff Yeager</author>
<category>News</category>
</item>
<item>
<title>I Totally Had Your Mom Last Night</title>
<link>http://www.mentaldischarge.com/1013</link>
<pubDate>Wed, 07 Jan 2004 23:00:00 GMT</pubDate>
<description>The night before was filled with steamy passion and erotic desire as intrepid reporter Steven Cleamer totally had your mother last night.</description>
<author>Steven Cleamer</author>
<category>News</category>
</item>
<item>
<title>Web Gurus Attack Furniture Stores</title>
<link>http://www.mentaldischarge.com/1111</link>
<pubDate>Wed, 10 Dec 2003 23:00:00 GMT</pubDate>
<description>In a desperate move to get Web sites to better adhere to standards, fans and supporters of the ATTAFTDODTDA launched protests against furniture stores throughout the Midwest.</description>
<author>Steven Cleamer</author>
<category>News</category>
</item>
<item>
<title>Anal Beads are for Fat, Lazy, Stupid People</title>
<link>http://www.mentaldischarge.com/1500</link>
<pubDate>Thu, 02 Oct 2003 23:00:00 GMT</pubDate>
<description>It's become a startling fact that people these days are too lazy to regard sex with even the slightest bit of effort.</description>
<author>Wang Dong</author>
<category>Sex</category>
</item>
<item>
<title>Samurai in September</title>
<link>http://www.mentaldischarge.com/1088</link>
<pubDate>Thu, 11 Sep 2003 23:00:00 GMT</pubDate>
<description>There's something alluring and noble about the samurai. Maybe it's their cool in the face of danger and their immutable stoicism, their sly tricks against enemies and code of honor amongst friends, or maybe it's that big sword.</description>
<author>Biff Yeager</author>
<category>Humanity</category>
</item>
<item>
<title>CockBlockerTM Revolutionizes Online Dating</title>
<link>http://www.mentaldischarge.com/1008</link>
<pubDate>Thu, 10 Jul 2003 23:00:00 GMT</pubDate>
<description>After four years of bad dates, Amanda Stevens was close to swearing off dating forever. That is, until she picked up Symantec's new CockBlockerTM Security Suite.</description>
<author>Biff Yeager</author>
<category>News</category>
</item>
<item>
<title>My New Robot Can't Fucking Kill Anybody</title>
<link>http://www.mentaldischarge.com/1502</link>
<pubDate>Sat, 21 Jun 2003 00:00:00 GMT</pubDate>
<description>Does my AIBO attack young children? Is it responsible for the 400+ dog-bite related fatalities every year? Can I tack &quot;Beware of AIBO&quot; signs on my fence? Hell no.</description>
<author>Biff Yeager</author>
<category>Technology</category>
</item>
<item>
<title>China Disney Celebrates Grand Opening</title>
<link>http://www.mentaldischarge.com/1004</link>
<pubDate>Wed, 18 Jun 2003 23:00:00 GMT</pubDate>
<description>Mass looting and riots erupted Tuesday in what Chinese officials call their most successful, and only, Western theme park opening ever.</description>
<author>Biff Yeager</author>
<category>News</category>
</item>
<item>
<title>Fartistic Anatomies</title>
<link>http://www.mentaldischarge.com/1011</link>
<pubDate>Tue, 22 Oct 2002 00:00:00 GMT</pubDate>
<description>Researched from the finest minds and the fattest asses, learn the various inner workings of your own gaseous emanations of emmense proportions.</description>
<author>Steven Cleamer</author>
<category>Humanity</category>
</item>
<item>
<title>The Back-to-School Checklist</title>
<link>http://www.mentaldischarge.com/1014</link>
<pubDate>Tue, 20 Aug 2002 23:00:00 GMT</pubDate>
<description>It's that time of the year again where parents pile up on school supplies in order to send their rugmonkeys back into the trembling hands of the public education system.</description>
<author>Biff Yeager</author>
<category>Technology</category>
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